Don’t try to be someone else, Be a better you

Living abroad is certainly not easy everyday. It’s a constant adjustment and too often I am asking WHY this happened to me instead of HOW I could change this situation and my negative thoughts.

With Social Media, the Facebook or Instagram feed, we admire others, see their perfect life and feel bad to not have done this activity or trip before. We feel that our lives are less admirable, less great, less successful… Really shitty.

Our society push us to compare ourself every single minute, to compete all the time which gives as a terrible result: jealousy. It’s very ugly and it’s a horrible feeling to see ourselves not enough good at something.

I wish for everybody to get up one morning and realize this extraordinary feeling of self acceptance. To accept yourself. To finding yourself and your place in the world.

But, wait. It’s going to take time and it won’t be perfect everyday, however when your start to fully accept your human mistakes, that you can’t be perfect and just let go. You will see the big difference in your daily routine.

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Why is self acceptance so important?

The relationship with the others will be better and less stressful. You won’t be afraid to go to your boss office and ask for something, you won’t be afraid to tell a story at a big family event. Of course, it’s different for all of us. I realize that self acceptance helps me to not be shy when I have to talk with my family-in-law in English. Knowing that I have my French accent and that sometimes I am saying mistakes. It’s tough when you have 40 eyes who look at you (and certainly critize your attitude, face, body…) while you’re trying to tell something and they just don’t get your words.

When we accept ourselves and love ourselves fully, only then can we truly love another and be loved in return.

Just stop to compare yourself and don’t listen people who tells you that you’re not good enough in comparaison with X or Y.

What happens when you accept yourself?

Traveling the world and be married with somebody from a different culture teach me a lot.

I have learned to understand myself better as I have to express my feeling in my second-language, to love myself for exactly who I am, who I have become, and who I am evolving into. I am petite, not blue eyes and not blond hair. My legs are not super skinny and I have no boobs!

However, I instead pour all my energies into living life to the fullest, loving every minute of it, and with the sole purpose of inspiring others to do the same.

Taking risks is certainly difficult but once you have jumped the bond, you start a marathon to take the responsability of your previous risks. I have decided to live abroad and to be married with an American. I know that I will live most of my life away from my country and my family.

I’ve learned the value of success is different for everyone, and for me, I find happiness in travelling/living in Chicago and in doing so, encouraging people to achieve their dreams. I believe in being educated beyond education – learning from the other and from your own experiences.

How to learn to accept yourself

There’s nothing wrong with you.

Now that I am living far away from my best girl friends, I realize how there are different. I love them for all the different opinions and love what they teach me. One is an English Teacher, another one is living in Africa and the third one is dealing with her political career while she is a mum.

We all are different and our brain works with different needs and expectation. I prefer raw vegetables, you might prefer dessert. I prefer to walk, you might prefer to take your car. I prefer swimming better than running.

We all have our preferences. We just have to accept it. Most important people change by learning from the others. The woman I am today will be different in 10 years. Guess what? This is the best gift that you can offer to yourself. To be a better you.

Okay, so you’re not six foot tall with perfect blond hair? Me neither.

Personally, I can’t get up every morning at 5AM and go to bed at 9PM. But it doesn’t mean that I am lazy or I do less during the day. You aren’t as smart as your friend who’s flying through university with scores that would rival Einstein? That’s too bad – but you’ve probably got a much livelier social life and you’re also likely to have less signs of stress and age.

Once again, there is nothing wrong with you.

We are all different. Embrace your creativity and your particularity. They make you who you are and it’s beautiful.

Love and accept your imperfections. Now let them go. Don’t listen people who critize you, don’t let them hurt you.

Life is too short to be anything but happy.


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Cécile lives in Chicago though is originally from southern France. She’s an avid traveler and is always excited by new adventures. After living in Ireland, Australia and Canada, Cécile is an advocate of having a routine but not staying comfortable for too long.

 

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